Friday was my last day at Microsoft, and today is my first day at my “new job.” Or, actually, two new jobs. There is a huge tension that has been removed and a new freedom that I’m walking in. From my previous posts, I think it’s evident that Microsoft has hurt my heart—constantly lessening my confidence and stealing my joy. I needed a change, but even in the conflict, I lacked the courage to leave. God needed to close that door for me.
So, He did, and now here I am. There are a few things I know for certain about me—and some drive my wife nuts. First, I am a creator. I enjoy the challenge and adventure of taking nothing and creating something out of it. I don’t need a path; I don’t need structure. I cut my own path, and I define my own structure. I am an entrepreneur, and I enjoy starting companies and running teams. I believe that this creativity stems from the creativity of my Father. I understand that not everyone shares this passion. But, this is a passion He has imparted to me. There were seasons within Microsoft that I had opportunities to create. I had the freedom to run. These seasons were spent under the oversight of a few people who “got me.” But, these seasons were often (too) short and infrequent. For the most part, I was trapped by the bureaucracy of a larger enterprise, and I felt suffocated.
Second, I am a teacher. I enjoy (am passionate) about taking a complex subject—the cloud, programming, or Scripture—and breaking it down so that it is easier to understand. I have been told by countless folks that they recognize this ability in me. But, once again, these types of opportunities very seldom came.
I understand that this post may seem negative and narcissistic. But it’s not. There is a silver lining here. Sometimes, in order to move forward rightly, you must reflect on where you’ve been and what hasn’t worked. Such is the case now. Recognizing where I’ve been sets the direction for where I need to go. The past is a compass for the future. So, here I go. The sails are cast, and the heading is set. It’s time to move forward in freedom with God’s grace as my wind. I’m not exactly sure what the future holds, but I’m excited to see what lies in store beyond the horizon.
